Thanks

Maxfield Parrish, "Ottauquechee River"

You know you don’t deserve this, right?

So, that’s why you’ve got to be grateful for every single instant and instance of it, including even the part where testosterone and the internal combustion engine combine to make things a little scary along the busy asphalt you generally eschew when all by yourself but are delighted to have the opportunity to experience efficiency upon while in a group of two-wheeled miscreants.

It’s easy to feel overwhelming gratitude for the Maxfield Parrish version of the Chinese handscroll painting done by nature’s own Bob Ross as you gaze through the overhanging willow branches perfectly framing the waxing gibbous moon shining brightly on Jupiter and Saturn across the sky.

Besides its own intrinsic beauty, you just have to remember that our fellow living creatures in hotspots across the globe like Haiti and Afghanistan and Dixie, California and on and on and on have the same view of the heavens, but theirs hasn’t been arrived at via bicycle and also doesn’t include simultaneously getting to immerse themselves in the weightless wonder of warm and enveloping lake water while staring up at it.

So it’s okay that the intended parking garage view is inaccessible and that surely some other possibilities aren’t entirely maximized; any misgivings are just gilding the lily, so to speak; any imperfections are like those intentional “kill holes” in the bottom of traditional pottery that not only lets the soul of the dead pass through but which also, I’ve been told, is so that the work won’t offend the gods by challenging them with a perfect human artifact.

Because honestly, whatever it is that makes everything happen could not be more generous with its grace than it is, especially to such undeserving subjects as all of us everywhere are, so what else is there to do than cry “halleluiah kyrie elaison allah akbar om namah shivaya fucking-A baruch hashem thank you Jesus Goddamn yessiree wowie zowie lord have mercy amen.” 

Sho(r)ts

The “doctrine of double-effect” is the somewhat contentious ethical principle that an act which has morally-problematic consequences can be justified if those consequences were unintended.  Assuming that the person performing the act was trying to do something good (or, at least, not something bad), they can be let of the hook, ethically speaking, if a less-than-ideal outcome ensues, just so long as they weren’t actually trying to bring that outcome about.

So, for instance, in medical ethics, a physician can justify hastening death for a terminally-ill patient by prescribing lots of pain medication; because the doctor’s intent is to reduce the patient’s suffering, it’s considered (by proponents of the doctrine of double-effect) to be morally acceptable for the administration of the drugs to bring about the patient’s demise.  The doctor wasn’t trying to kill the patient; that just happened as a “double effect” of the analgesic.

And while I’m not completely sold on the coherence of the principle, it does come in handy when, as a vegetarian, one needs to make an exception in the case of Jello shots.  You see, the animal wasn’t killed for the bones that go into making the gelatin; it was killed for its meat; the bones are a by-product, a “double-effect” of that killing, so Jello’s cool.

Same goes for the wearing of short pants after dark.  As long as those pants are intended for swimming, (or biking), they can appropriately be sported by an adult male even after the sun sets and a blood orange crescent moon rises over the Lake.

Coincidentally, both these examples were in play on this year’s version of the annual Jello Slip n’ Slide ride, modified, as per the ongoing pandemic, to focus primarily on the Jello itself slipping and sliding down one’s throat.

And, of course, the intoxication that followed was perfectly justified, since that was a double-effect of the primary intent to enjoy the fruity flavor and ingest healthy protein for the ride.

Stroll

 Walking your bike is dumb.  It doesn’t even make linguistic sense.  But you do notice more of your surroundings on foot, like that iridescent algae on the sides of the locks.

Appeasement might not be such a bad strategy when officials are all worked up.  So, unsaddling, why not?  

But downhill is different.  And if the intention is to make things better for everyone, then their rules should be re-examined.

Scientific principles prevail, in any event; no shortage of oxygen for the fire, even if smoke smokes ‘em out.

On the tip-top of the tippy-top, memories remembered, remember?

Suppose it were established that the entire community of consciousnesses has divided itself between human beings and most of everything else.  Wouldn’t the trees and natural cycles, for the most part, align themselves against us?  Can you blame them?

We’d have to have the rats and possums on our side, though. They do better with us, as do, probably raspberries and corn, for instance.  What an endless battle/dance it would forever be.  And maybe already is.

Don’t forget that what we really need to wonder about is: where does all the water go?

Measurable rainfall is a thing and one that, with any luck, we’ll have to get more used to soon.  In the meantime, though, both freshwater and saltwater can be sampled in a single evening, even if the later only goes over your toes.  

Technically speaking: two swims; no exaggeration whatsoever: two fires, one like some sort of signal beacon from a Tolkien trilogy, the other more of a cheery circle of increasing connection.  The good news is, no bikes went missing, no bones were broken, and not a single person ended up in jail and hardly even a talking-to.

Summer’s not over yet, no way.  Sure, it’s getting darker earlier, but that just means you’ve got to bring more of your own light to the party.  You know how it’s done; just keep on getting lit.