Inferno

Photo by Joshua Trujillo, SeattlePI.com

tehJobies wondered what, with a fire suit and four handles of Everclear, could possibly go wrong, and the answer, it turns out is nothing, apparently, as yet another bicycle-powered post-Christmas War On Christmas (Trees) bonfire and drinking party went off without a hitch (besides the ones on bike trailers) and, as far as I know, not a single third-degree burn, although I wouldn’t be surprised if Fancy Fred and a few others were missing some eyebrows in the morning.

The prospect of seeing several score dry evergreens combust to illuminate the night sky really brings ‘em out; lots of old familiar but rarely seen faces showed up at Westlake for the only-slightly-faster-than-Critical-Mass speed parade to Golden Gardens with a stop at the Peddlar Brewery to strap trees on bikes, in backpacks, and atop at least one pickup truck.

Riders were greeted at the beach by incognito Elves who delighted one and all with grownup hot chocolates garnished with baby marshmallows floating in 190-proof goodness.

Everclear’s effect, appropriately enough, is not unlike the way a month-old Christmas tree bursts into flame: suddenly, you’re all aglow and the formerly sedate are now laughing and lying, screaming at trains, and occasionally semi-disrobing.

Think of all the memories embodied in those flaming firs: sparkly-giftwrapped presents under their lowest branches, stars and angels atop their highest reach.  Then, in an instant, the transformation to sparks and cinders takes place and a brand-new recollection is burnished on the brain and in the heart.

If I come back as a Doug or Noble in Chubby and Tubby’s lot some December, this is how I want to go, that’s for sure.

You can almost get used to the sight of thirty-foot high flames and so, come to feel jaded when, afterwards, all that’s left is a crackling fire that warms dozens for hours. 

But then you remember that just because the spectacular has become commonplace, doesn’t mean the commonplace isn’t spectacular.

On fire, in fact.